Articles on Children

Wikipedia defines security blanket as a “familiar object whose presence provides comfort or security to its owner”.

It’s important that your newborn baby feel secure in order to develop good sleeping habits. Parents help babies feel secure in many ways including keeping baby well fed, warm, clean, dry and comfortable. However, a security blanket offers baby the feeling of security during times when mommy can’t be there. It reminds baby of mommy and becomes an extension of her. A security blanket makes the transition from daytime to nighttime, awake time to naptime much easier. It calms fears and reduces stress and anxiety. It is truly “mommy’s helper”!

A SHIELD FROM FEARS. “The security object offers physical comfort and is very reassuring,” says Joeanne Gutzwiller, PhD, a child psychologist in private practice. “It’s essentially portable security when mom and dad can’t be there. Most children develop a dependency on an object in the first year of life, and dependency is usually highest by age 2 or 3. This is the age when fears, such as fear of the dark and fear of dogs, start to emerge. A security object can be quite reassuring to a child who feels afraid.”

Dr. Harvey Karp, in his book The Happiest Toddler on the Block, encourages parents to “give your toddler a chance to develop a ‘relationship’ with a satiny blanket. Keep one around him all day long and with him at night.” Dr. Karp encourages mothers to touch it a lot. The blanket will become more comforting as it takes on the scent of mommy. Dr. Karp goes on to talk about how these “calming toys are basically Mommy substitutes. They’re a step between you and your child’s first real friend.” Security blankets help toddlers deal with illness, parental absences, trips, new siblings, and new and frightening situations.

A STRESS REDUCER. Although we tend to believe that children live worry-free lives, that may not be true. Babies, especially as they begin to reach toddlerhood, can find the world rather intimidating. Their physical and mental skills are not fully developed. It is often hard for them to understand and deal with our adult world even when we try to bring everyday challenges down to their level. As a result, they deal with their fair share of stress. Hugging a special stuffed animal, rubbing a blanket across their cheek, and clinging to their favorite security object are healthy options for small children to reduce stress.

THE RESEARCH. Richard H. Passman, a psychologist at the University of Wisconsin at Milwaukee, set out to answer the questions: “Are attachments to security objects and mothers related? Do children securely and insecurely attached to mothers use security blankets differently?” His findings revealed that “Being attached to a security object can be beneficial to a child. Left in an unfamiliar playroom with a supportive agent (mother or transitional object), children played, explored, and refrained from crying more so than did children who had their favorite hard toy or who had no supportive agent available (Passman & Weisberg, 1975).” Therefore, a special soft cuddly object provides more comfort and security than a hard noncuddly toy. When a child is confronted with an unfamiliar or stressful situation, the child who is attached to a security blanket will fair better than a child with no attachment. Up to sixty percent of children in the United States have some sort of security blanket during childhood. Dr. Passman has found no negative or lasting effects. However, he has found many positive ones!

WEANING CHILDREN OFF. As your child gets older you may find it difficult to manage a security blanket. You may want to limit its use. You may tell your child that the blanket will stay at home except for special occasions. Or limit it for bedtime only. These ideas are preferable to getting rid of it all together. There are times that may require increased use such as the birth of a new sibling or moving to a new house. Be sensitive to these needs and allow your child to use it as long as necessary. Some daycare centers may discourage the use of security blankets for a variety of reasons including hygienic and social. You may consider talking to your providers if your child is likes to carrying it with him everywhere. Consider suggesting that your child be allowed to use it during naptime as a calming agent.

IN REVIEW. Experts agree that it is very important for children to have a security blanket or lovey. Children find comfort in them because they remind them of Mommy. Security blankets may calm your baby’s fears, anxiety, and stress.

Lonnie Knell raised triplets and is the proud grandmother of two. She has a BA in Special Education from Northeastern Illinois University and a MS in Non-profit Administration from Roosevelt University.

Personalized Baby Gifts by Embroidery Master

Karp, Harvey, The Happiest Baby On The Block, Copyright 2004, The Transitional Object or The Security Blanket

http://www.parentingtots.org/skills11.html

BNET Encyclopedia of Childhood and Adolescence byRichard H. Prass, Ph D. University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee

http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_g2602/is_0004/ai_2602000472/pg_3?tag=artBody;col1

Baby Zone – Loveys and Security Blankets: Understanding Transitional Objects by Beth M. Lovinelli, RN, BSN, IBCLC

http://www.babyzone.com/askanexpert/loveys-security-blankets

Psychology Today – Security Blankets by Fawn Fitter

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-20050422-000008.html

Associated Content – Giving Children Security Blankets Encourages Good Sleeping Habits by Deborah Chavez http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/637113/giving_children_security_blankets_encourages.html?cat=44

BNET Pediatrics For Parents by Michael K. Meyerhoff

http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0816/is_3_22/ai_n16033466

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My daughter is 28 months.  She’ll go to the potty, sit for a few minutes, and then she gets up and pees either in her training pants or on the floor.  What can I do?  She doesn’t like stickers or suckers.

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My baby has slept in her own bed ever since she was two weeks old.  She started sleeping through the night when we moved her into her crib in her own room. During the day, she screamed when I put her into a carrier.  She would rather lay and play than be held. I hear advice that if you don’t sleep with your baby and don’t pack them around all day that you are a bad mother.  And, heaven forbid you let a baby cry for a couple of minutes.  What is wrong with trying to nurture independent children? I’m an elementary school teacher. I see many children (ranging from 6 to 12) that can’t do anything on their own and I wonder if their mother ever tried to foster independence. I agree that young babies need to be responded to quickly when they cry. But, I know when she needs me fast and when she is just fussing.   I’ll also agree that a baby that feels safe (from being responded too) will be more independent, but where do you draw the line? When do you stop sleeping with them and carrying them around all the time?

I do co-sleep with my son, but I don’t think that makes for a bad mom. I think it’s the parent’s decision to do what they believe is best for their family.  Co-sleeping just works for us.  As long as you are doing what works for your child and family, I say more power to you! During the day, my son plays on his playmat and in his play pen by himself (with me in the room watching, of course).  Although, some people can be very judgemental, do what is right for your family!

When I ask my son (7 years old) to do something, like pick up his room or put away his games, he always asks me to help him. I tell him no, that he is capable of doing it himself. He is somewhat lazy, and I am trying to foster a sense of independence and accomplishment. Should I help him, or am I doing the right thing? I do not want to foster his laziness.

My 14 month old daughter has a Montessori-style bedroom with a futon mattress on the floor, giving her access to her toys and the entire space of her room in order to foster independence. The room has been completely baby-proofed, but lately she has taken to gnawing the paint off of her window sills, which she can reach when standing up. Does anyone have any suggestions for preventing this? We are not interested in moving her to a crib.

I like to let my kids discover things for themselves to foster confidence, independence and learning. I try to only step in when they are in danger, loud, will not share, or will hurt other kids. I find that other parents often annoy the hell outta me. They will let there kid push my child or break her toys. They do not disipline, but when the shoe is on the other foot…they are the first ones to say something. Example: my baby was hugging an kissing my friends son, I could tell it annoyed her, she wanted me to stop the behavior. My child is not even two, she was just showing affection why should I punish her? Diff. Example: a 2 yr old boy pushes my 13 month daughter down and she knocks her head on concrete she screams, the parents say nothing to me or there son I am scared about dealing with parents in the future. I don’t like confrontaion…and it seems kids are always doing something that could spark a fight between you and another parent. How do you deal? There are so many different parenting styles! How do we all get along? I want to tell the passive people to disipline there children….and I want to tell the uptight strict people to ease up a little bit. I guess I am more middle of the road when it comes to parenting, but it seems as though everyone is so one sided and close minded when it comes to there kids
YES!!! I really do hate them most of the time. Astoundingly, many of my friends have become TERRIBLE parents. One friend has a nervous breakdown at every get-together because her child a snotty “princess” who won’t share. Both our kids are learning to share but she takes it personally. Another friend talks negatively about her children IN FRONT OF THEM as if they are case studies. She calls them “this one” and “that one” rather than their names. Plus she has one very disturbed kid who she keeps yo-yo-ing on and off of ADD drugs and in and out of school. It breaks my heart. Oh and then there’s the friend who’s youngest has had a runny nose for 1 1/2 years and they no longer even try to wipe his nose, then the encourage him to kiss my daughter. I don’t think so! Oh and the entire “princess” thing pisses me off. My daughter is special, unique, etc. However I do not fill her heard with princess, diva, ruler of the universe ideas. That’s just programming your child to be a BRAT in my opinion.

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